Farewell my Grumpy Friend

Tucker as a kitten, and me at 10

My childhood feline friend

Tucker and I at my moms house Christmas 2008

His name was Tucker James. He had been my friend for 18 years and 8 months. I remember our last night together as he lay dying. His kidneys were failing, and my heart was breaking. I knew after all these years and all we had been through I could no longer fix what was going wrong inside his body. We had fought the Hyperthyroidism, and that went well for a year or so, but this new symptom in the mix was too much for him to pull through. He had blocked twice in his last Two months and was losing his appetite. He loved to eat. It was all he used to live for, and now, he couldn't even justify staying for that. I slept on the couch with him that night praying that he would make it through the night so he wouldn't have to experience the full extent of his body shutting down. I wanted him to be spared the pain of dying on his own. I often feel like I made him wait too long to feel the sweet release of leaving his earthbound mortal shell, and I wonder if he hold it against me. Everything happened so fast. Monday he seemed fine. Tuesday he had a slight hitch in his gait as he walked by, but I thought nothing of it. Wednesday He came to Work with me for his Thyroid test and he seemed off. My Vet told me He had turned a corner, but I just thought I had more time. By Thursday Morning he was having a HARD time walking and got himself stuck half in the litter box. I put the kitty diapers on him so he wouldn't have to get in the Box. Sadly by Thursday evening He couldn't walk AT ALL. Friday I brought him back to work with me. His blood work was BAD. He was placed on IV fluids to keep him comfortable and I made the appointment to have him released from this world. I really should have let him go on Friday, but I made a selfish decision. I didn't want to have him Die where I worked and have to face everyone with their sympathetic eyes. I didn't want to remember the room I worked in everyday as the room where we parted ways. I took him the next morning to another Vet that I knew well. He went quickly. In the blink of an eye my Friend, my beloved pet, was gone. Forever. On October 23, 2010 a chapter of my life that started in February of 1992 ended.

Tuckers' Urn that sits on my Mantle.

I will always hold the fond memories of him close to my heart. His ashes sit on my Mantel inside a white porcelain cat with his collar hanging around the neck. On his collar his guardian angel charm I bought for him years ago on a school trip. I like to think that he is my guardian angel now, and that he is with me, always. <3>